Beyond Cynicism

Can you truly overcome abandonment?

My father has been gone for 16 years. I don’t blame my father for leaving, for I know that he had many problems and obstacles to overcome however, I can’t say that it has not affected me. As a matter of fact, it affects me everyday. I choke relationships and constantly feel unwanted or feel like I have go the extra mile for people to like me. In reality, people rarely dislike me and i’m always being told that i am a strong person and that it seems like the abandonment has no affect on me. Recently I feel like that I have been tricking myself into feeling like it doesn’t bother me. I feel like this is the root of all of my problems. My Mother shut down due to this and following abusive husbands/boyfriends and was rarely able to be there for me. I got into a lot of trouble as a kid. I tried to self medicate with sex. I’m now a father to three sons at 24 and will never leave them. I overcame a lot and am about to graduate college but, can I truly ever overcome the abandonment? how? when?

I am so sorry this happened to you. God gives all of his creation free choice and it is not His fault that people in our lives chose to make selfish choices that had a negative impact on us. The good thing is that God is there to lean on when those around us let us down. I too have been searching for a way to heal a broken heart due to neglect, abandonment and abuse. Father heal this young man’s heart, help him to lean on you and find the peace, joy and love that only you can give. Forgive us all when we fail you and help us to be ready when you come as spoken of in Thessalonians. Thank you Father, In Jesus name…
I asked a similar question and the answer worshipful heart gave was so good and cut through years of therapy in one paragraph. Let me share it with you as I have her permission
ASKER: I know that we are “Fearfully and wonderfully made”. Are there any other ways of recovering from the lies
told and shown to us as children by those in Satan’s service; that we are worthess, don’t measure up, no good…and all the other negatives that keep us from becoming who God wants us to be. On an intellectual level we know, but, it is the heart level that needs repair. Mmm
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Best Answer by Worshipful heart
Forgiveness- forgiveness is the key.
When we are able to recognize those that hurt us did so because they were hurt and hurting, forgive them and do not hold their sin against them, leave the lies and false reports at the cross for God to deal with- then we are more easily able to receive what God has told us about who we are.

Another way of looking at things is recognizing that unforgiveness is idolotry.
When you receive and believe what another person has told you about yourself rather than what God has told you about yourself- you are putting that person in the place of God, giving them the authority to define who you are which in turn affects your choices, emotions and reactions. Take that person out of that place of authority, repent for receiving their report over God’s report, forgive them for their sin and daily ask God to remind you who you are in Jesus . Take captive every thought that would rebel against what God says, bring it into the obedience of Christ Jesus and walk in it.
When you have truly forgiven the offender, YOU are free . . .FREE. . . free from their sin that has held you in bondage for so long!

† Heaven Bound Prayer Warrior †

“Look up for your redemption draweth nigh”. Mmm

(Dutch) True Change / NLP Deel 1